Guide to speed dating
Funnily enough, having men sit and women rotate in a speed dating context switches the typical gender role and wipes out the gender difference in selectivity, making men just as picky as women.
If the dating scene in your town has you and your single friends longing for the days of arranged marriages, or if you're happily attached and ready to take your matchmaking urges to the next level, it may be time to consider hosting a speed dating event.
Speed dating has been around since 1999, when Rabbi Yaacov Deyo and several of his single students put a new twist on the longstanding Jewish tradition of introducing young Jewish singles to one another at chaperoned gatherings.
At a speed dating event, participants are paired up in a series of quick five- to seven-minute "dates." When the time is up, a bell or timer is rung, and participants move on to their next one-on-one conversation.
While seven minutes may not seem long enough to determine whether a new acquaintance is a potential match, Rabbi Deyo and other speed dating organizers have found that it gives participants plenty of time to gauge their level of interest or get a feeling that the other person is just not the right fit.
To my never-ending delight, being a social psychologist can sometimes make me feel like I have an insider’s guide to social life.
When I discovered that two dear friends of mine were about to try speed dating for the first time, I couldn’t help offering some (yes, unsolicited) terribly handy research-based advice: “Be selective!
They’ll like you more if you don’t show interest in everybody.” My random tip amused my friends, but my outburst didn’t do justice to the scope of research done on speed dating in our field in recent years.
For you, dear readers, just in time for Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d provide a quick and dirty guide to the basics of what goes down in speed dating interactions.
Despite endorsing these traditional gendered preferences before speed dating, both men and women end up preferring attractive, personable speed dating partners with good earning prospects, both for the short- and long-term.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating